Tail

It took quite some time before the results of PW actually sank in. There wasn't much of a need to reflect on the work I put in - I stayed up longer into the night for gaming than I ever did for the stupid subject. I never had troublesome teammates, unless you count the supervising tutor that condemned us to fail since last year April. Nonetheless the implications are frighteningly non-existent. either because I got an A or it didn't mean anything in the first place.
Whenever anything has come to an end, deep down inside we all know it hasn't. For example, after my PSLE I really thought I could play all day for the rest of my life until Sec 1 kicked me in the nuts for being second last in class.
The process is supposed to be more interesting; nobody ever takes more than a glance at the fullstop after a sentence. I can honestly attest to that, simply because my memory is horrendously not selective when it comes to mundane events in the past as compared to the block of text residing in notes which I must remember now.
If it was anything about PW that I can remember, it was me describing the composition of our Written Report as well as the preparation for the Oral Presentation to be nothing short of an "extreme makeover". Not because I have watched the show (not once), but because these two words alone sums it all up.
My understanding of how memory works is overly simplistic. Everything that we have experienced has always been there, residing in some unknown section of our brain. In order to recall that piece of information, a key word or feeling is attached to it for convenience. Thats how I remember stuff for exams anyway. You don't throw out all of your system files onto your desktop; there are folders for a reason. And remembering what happened earlier than two years old is rather impossible unless you've been abused terribly bad, so be thankful for the way it is now.
I can think of a really perfect paragraph to describe my secondary school life, but I'll be too shy to say it. I can attach "..." to my past five birthdays or so because it has been that way and pretty much the same for all of them. "SON OF A -----" has been stickied onto certain people. But being fortunate, I never knew how to describe how my whole life has been so far.
"The end draws near" is what this unit called the "warden" in my game always say as a response whenever you move her around. With my attention glued to a billion other details happening on screen, I never had the time to consider these words in entirety. Her aim is to bring a fugitive back to his cell, but upon doing so, it simply implies that the reason for her existence no longer exists. I never took the story seriously, so don't shoot me for being beyond an addict.
For all the things in life we ever knew them to be, we are very, very selective in the way we want them to turn out to be. More often than not, life *clowns* back at us in the face by showing us just how little control we actually have. This is not to say that we should hate it and say "gg I'm out", but instead hope for the best with trying, knowing that at least you can't lose. I panicked a week before NAPFA because I know I can't jump. That will be the deciding section to see if I'll have to enter the army 2 months earlier (only sickos want to). 220cm seems really far because that's more than two-thirds the mat - if you've seen the 3m long mat you'll be freaked out too. At the third try (when only two was allowed), I swung my hands like a monkey and actually went ONE CENTIMETRE beyond the 220 mark. I did a 221! To be honest, there's nothing miraculous about the above, sorry.
There hasn't been so much of an end as there was a start for anything. Authors demarcate chapters for cataloging purposes; man designate segments of time to be millenniums and centuries for reference; God (which I haven't believed in yet) spins the Earth daily so that we'll get our lazy selves off the bed when the sun shines over our ass. In reality everything flows endlessly,being independant of whether we're there to make it happen. But because we aren't fictional sentient beings, we'll never be the wiser to the obvious, and we'll never be able to marvel at truly grand things.
Continuity correction aside, it's so much better if we simply stop to reflect consciously, and not during self assigned checkpoints. This way we won't lose sight of what's really happening around us.
Whenever anything has come to an end, deep down inside we all hope it hasn't - and that's what makes it all the more beautiful to begin with - because it only lasts this long.

Glass

Someone told me two weeks ago that I had "chiobus" in my class, namely X1 and X2. He then commented on what a nice class I have, presumably because of that. To be specific, I had to ask "HUH WHO'S THE CHIOBU" when he mentioned them, not because the girls in my class are unsightly, but because I'm freaking curious. First up, I didn't agree with whatever he said but of course being a 'gentleman' I didn't mouth it all out - I didn't find those two that he mentioned to be "chiobus". And second, they're already taken up, so there's not much point in trying to agree with what he said.
The first time I heard the term "chiobu" was back in P6. I thought they're talking about "chou" (ugly in chinese) girls so I couldn't join in half the conversations. Thankfully I don't live under a rock. I figured out what it means 'intuitively' but never actually applied it extensively to girls in reality. The times when I use this term would be those like a really good shot being made in any sports game and I go "WAH CHIO LA". (I don't really like being a spectator)
As a rule of thumb, it is my innocent belief that marrying someone who happens to be chio is a plus, but marrying someone because she's chio has serious implications: it's best that you mentally prepare your divorce papers at any rate.
'Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder' sounds too butterfly-rainbowish for dimwits like me to chew on, but I probably got it all figured out using all the time I spent stoning my existence away. Here's a really good example: I went to my friend's birthday party once when another classmate of mine brought along his PS3. The moment my eyes laid itself upon it, I couldn't stop stroking it and kept murmuring "sexy nia...". Everyone there had a good laugh. Truth is, I really couldn't pull my hands off its sleak surface and am completely mesmerised by it. However, I can swear I'm mentally sane because I'm capable of typing this sentence (i.e insane people would try 'I'M NORMAL OK'). I'm also not a gadget fanatic, as proven by my oh-so-durable handphone that's worthy of being exhibited in any museum (five year old model, anyone?). I do find a PS3 fascinating, but like any infatuation, it was only temporary. Which was to my relief since I didn't have to fork out $1000 to get myself excited.
Scientifically speaking, it could be possibly due to certain chemical signals in my brain that simply zapped the wrong way at the wrong time, resulting in a mental state that's beyond meditation. That's what any Romeo would call "love at first sight", any pervert as one hot chick, and any neurologist as a biological marvel to go wow at.
It might be 'worrying' to some that their relationship was composed based on pure chemistry and not magic as they would like to have believed. On the other hand, Amortentia in the Harry Potter series exists only in, well, the Harry Potter series. What would happen if you try drowning dung beetles in that? Would they really smell fragrant and delicious poo?
Animals have come a pretty long way in evolution in terms of finding their perfect mates, but I am honestly clueless as to how the connection works. Having watched countless episodes of Animal Planet where elephants get horny, I can't distinguish one from another. (pointless paragraph)
Someone kept lol-ing at me for being close to someone who's 'fugly' to him. I couldn't blame him, because he couldn't ever see it from my eyes. I just happen to find this particular someone very... undescribable. Dang. I must have threw my vocab out of the window. Or maybe there just aren't any that I can use.
At least I needn't prep my divorce papers specially for the abovementioned cause.

A rainbow's beautiful not because it's monochromatic.

Up

I emailed my doctor regarding my eye condition, and he gave a reply stating that I'm likely to be posted to a non-combat vocation. It sounds anything but bad to me. (HEHE)
~~
Today (was) a crucial match for the guys' squash team. We already lost to ACSI, and we had to win ACJC if we're to stand any chance of going into the top four. I had a premonition but I kept it to myself mostly other than my fellow referee.
The captain called for lots of support, and even made an arrangement to swap courts so as to accomodate the supporters. He hoped, unfortunately in vain, that it was going to have a positive effect. It didn't, or perhaps there wasn't any. On hindsight, the players might have performed better if there weren't any support to begin with, with the pressure being less overbearing. But again, on hindsight even Einstein might have been dropped into a Woodbridge equivalent before he became a genius, so there's no point looking back (now).
Strange enough, I didn't feel one bit sad when 5-0 was incoming, not even till now. It must have been a habit of mine to drop attachment really quick when I can't get any (in)tangible benefits. Or maybe because I'm dead tired and sleepy just by thinking of the right picks for tomorrow's games. Either way, I'm more interested in the process of the entire match.
Being fierce is motivational to oneself, is aesthetic to the spectators; but most importantly, is unnerving to your enemies.