Yippee

Not a real word, I know =p
Ok so today's my birthday. How was the last one celebrated like? Hmm... playing the comp for god knows how many hours in a row, had all my meals at home, and it was only a full week away from the first paper of Prelim 2. If there's one thing I can definitely remember, it was me wishing that my eye problem would simply vanish altogether.
For obvious reasons, however, I've decided not to wish for that this year. I was informed that my condition had upgraded itself into a frightening "chronic" status, which means the meds would be part of my diet for a long, long time to come =( Yes, that's really bothering me every time I think about it. I know there would be a day that come when I no longer pop extra things into my mouth next to breakfast, but I guess it would still take really long for that to come. But who cares! I'm not dead yet, I can't die directly (indirectly is possible) from it. So what now? Celebrate till then lor =D
Today isn't exactly too different from the previous years. Played comp again in the morning (seems like everyday is my birthday then) before going out to watch Fantastic 4 with my cousin. And then came back home to eat dinner, before heading straight back to the comp....
Oh my. History really knows how to repeat itself, doesn't it?
It still impresses upon me how a dozen other people view their own birthdays as just another boring day, either because their parents weren't there to celebrate with them, or because they had no one to go out with, or because they're still pretty busy or because they have some exam going during the same period of time.
Hmm let's see. Only my dad was around when I started eating dinner for tonight. I have Common Tests next week (barely studied), and I also have to pray for a clean bill of health 2 days later, literally. Guess I am not a whole lot different.
What keeps me smiling then, is the fact that I know that this is a really nice day (albeit not entirely different). Why? Because unlike hundreds and thousands of people else where, I get a chance to "enjoy" this day in a way they wish they could. That being said, I'm really a lucky kid who has managed to clock up a lifetime of 17 years thus far, none of which were all too disturbing or harrowing.
When my brother returned from his BMT POP parade, he told me how one of his friends in the non-combatant unit had a guy whose mum called him one night, telling him that CID (Criminal Investigation Department) was looking for him. Another one of his friends was in the bunk waiting for lights out, when several of his platoon mates were discussing when police raids would occur at which gambling dens. After the POP parade itself, some of my brother's friends had to go over to another platoon mate's house in order to celebrate his son's first birthday. One of my brother's platoon mate had landed himself in jail twice before actually going for NS.
It does sound pretty funny initially when you first these stories, because not even in your wildest dreams would you ever be in their shoes. That being said, it's already evident that alot of us had more fortunate lives. I'm certain that many of these people were forced into such circumstances, trapped in a vicious cycle that they never had a chance to break out of as they're clueless as to how to.
Everyday's pretty "exciting" for them. They're either meeting under the void decks in the day, or gathering at night for a fight they'll have to take part in, in return for protection. How would their birthdays be like? Would they be able to stone in front of the comp as much as I do? Would they be able to just go for a movie in peace? Would they be able to celebrate a birthday without actually smoking or intoxicating themselves?
Given a chance, would they trade their lives for ours?
Nothing's ever enough. If not getting what you want would appear to be misfortune, what would losing something constitute? It's no wonder why Buddhism's a really nice religion - to be an effective buddhist and attain enlightenment, you'll have to be able to give up all forms of satisfaction, except enlightenment itself. No, I'm not a Buddhist, that's why I indulge myself in lots of fun =D
All in all, every birthday's special, because it is a date meant for celebration unique only to my ownself. What makes the date special isn't entirely what happened that day, but what went through your mind that day.
What went through my mind today? A whole lot of fun that, although seem routine to me, may never be experienced by many others who are less fortunate.
Last year, I thought that I have been existing in an amusement park my whole life, because I'm the happiest-go-luckiest person ever who never ceases to look back and laugh. Last year I took the roller coaster ride in ink and paper I thought I would never made it through without my eyes closed. I did it with my eyes wide open, because I still have to see through it no matter how much it hurts. Now, I'm still amused by how much I've actually studied for Common Test, just 5 days away. According to a teacher of mine, the mode for scores is a failure grade. Yet, mugging had the least amount of hours allocated to it. I'll die terribly this time =D
Guess I was right back then.
So what now?
Celebrate till then lor =D
*quoted and editted mei gui's ending*